My son got married a week ago. I’m feeling nostalgic about his days of living at home with us. I miss him when I’m grocery shopping because of foods I no longer buy; I miss him when I’m doing laundry because of clothes I no longer fold.

My son had a big ring of keys. When he used his house key to open the door, all the other keys would spin around. The other day I noticed that above the lock on the back door a little of the paint has been scratched off.  There’s a small knick on the bottom of the door, too, where he pushed the door closed with his foot so that he could lock it at night. 

I painted that back door less than a year ago. But I’d rather have the marks of my son’s comings and goings than have a perfect door. I cherish the scratches because I love the person who made them.

My house has other spots besides the paint on the door where keys and feet used to touch. There is a black mark on the wall besides the stairs where my daughter’s suitcase bumped as we carried it down to leave for the airport and a grease stain on the driveway where my husband and son changed his car’s oil together. These marks jog memories and make me smile because they are reminders of times shared with people I love.

In the same way that houses are marked by experiences, our bodies bear the marks of being lived in, too. Going the extra mile, putting others first, working through things, valuing togetherness, and being there can bring us a shortage of rest. Putting other’s needs first may result in our needs sometimes being overlooked.

There are times in life when we focus on our houses or our selves, when we work on looking good, cleaning well, getting repaired. Keeping after things is fine, but we shouldn’t forget that the nicks are valuable, too. They are the signs of life being lived and of love being shared.   

In her classic children’s story about The Velveteen Rabbit Margery Williams gives love the power to make toys real. But the velveteen rabbit was quite banged up in the process. Love is costly like that.

Jesus’ body bears the marks of his love for us. The sacrifice that His scars represent makes real Life a possibility for us. He is our example of how to spend life on a wonderful future return.     

We are cheered on by those who have gone before us (Hebrews 11). And we are encouraged in Christ, who knows all about worthwhile bruises. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, scorning the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12: 1-3